Should NYC Pay Bullied Girl's Private School Tuition?

Should NYC Pay Bullied Girl's Private School Tuition? By Laura Stanley on July 18, 2012 Print this article

As the national awareness of bullying becomes more prevalent, it’s no surprise that concerned parents in New York City pulled their daughter from her public school and placed her in a private school after learning that she was experience bullying at the hands of other students.

But they didn't stop at switching schools - they took the case to court. The family argued that when their 12 year-old daughter was teased for her learning disability and humiliated by other students, the faculty did nothing to protect her and end the bullying. They are demanding that the New York City Education Department pay the cost of her year at Summit School ($40,000) before the family moved to another school district in the staet.

Apparently, PS 6 Principal Lauren Fontant received complaints about bullies tripping and pushing the girl from classroom aides, but didn’t take action to stop the behavior and refused to discuss the incidents with the girl's parents.

A judge has ruled that the girl was indeed denied her educational rights, but they are doing further investigation to determine just how much the school district owes the family.

According to the New York Post, the New York City Department of Education “reimburses about $235 million a year in private-school tuition to parents who prove public schools did not adequately serve their kids with disabilities - but never before because of bullying.”

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21 Days To Quit Sucking (Thumbs)

By Sarah Dyer on July 11, 2012

It takes 21 days to break an old habit, or form a new one.

That's something I can work with. Of course to be all scientific about it, this isn’t based on any clinical evidence, only empirical data. So if, for example, you're trying to quit smoking - don't beat yourself up if you're still craving a smoke after 21 days, because it's going to take a lot more than that. But when it comes to breaking a child of a thumb-sucking habit, my pediatric dentist says that 21 days should do the trick.

21 days of sticker charts, three weeks of rewards and 504 hours of constant reminders.

Suddenly, 21 days is starting to sound like 21 months. It's probably just me, but I'm the worst at trying to keep track of the sticker chart-reward system. I tried to use it for potty training and I was so inconsistent that I ended up just giving my kid the sheet of stickers. Of course, they immediately stuck them on the toilet. And it turns out, they didn't need the system anyway - they just figured it out.

This isn’t the first time I'd heard this particular habit breaking/forming phenomenon. In my previous life (when I worked in marketing), we tossed around the idea of incentivizing the sales teams using the 21 day theory. If you upsell "XYZ" for 21 days straight, you get a huge reward. But what happens when someone is out for a day on the 18th day, do they start from day one when they get back? Well, yes. So in practice it was too hard to track and the idea fell by the wayside.

All of this was running through my head as I put my son to bed on our attempted first of 21 nights, especially because he was trying really hard not to suck his thumb. Do you have to start the week over if he sucks his thumb on the 6th night? Or the month over if its on the 19th night? That seems a little unfair.

As he lay wide awake almost an hour past his regular bedtime, my concern shifted from thumb-sucking to how tired he was going to be at school today. I finally caved and said, “You know what buddy, you did a great job. I’m proud of you for lasting this long, but you really need to sleep. So how about we restart this on Friday night when you don’t have to get up for school the next day.” With that, he resumed his thumb sucking and was asleep in less than a minute. And alas, my track record of success with sticker charts is right on course.

But I do like this 21 day idea and I think it will work. I like that it's broken up into manageable bits of time (daily stickers, three weeks of rewards). And I already know that I can’t be hardcore about it because of my personal chart deficiencies, but it doesn’t have to be perfect.

If it can save us from footing a cajillion dollar orthodontic bill in the future, then we’ll give it our best shot!

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Disposing Disposable Diapers

August 2,2012 | Written By: Alyssa | Categories:Alyssa's Camp,Battles |

I read some interesting statistics the other day as it pertains to diapers in Whole Living Magazine.

Here is what I learned…

95% of parents in the U.S. use disposable diapers;18 BILLION disposable diapers are sent to American landfills every year;Every baby will use approximately 8,000 diapers before they are potty trained;andIt takes at least 500 years for a disposable diaper to break down.

Pretty shocking if you ask me.  Maybe we should think about going back and using cloth diapers BUT then there is a flip side to that too.  Washing 1 load of cloth diapers is equivalent to 35 flushes of the toilet.  I guess there is no simple solution here.  The numbers are mind boggling.

By the time our kids are grown they will have to figure out a way to deal with all the disposable diapers and plastic bottles in our landfills,certainly not an easy task!

www.mommywarriors.com

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Shooting in Colorado Movie Theater

July 20,2012 | Written By: Alyssa | Categories:Alyssa's Camp,General |

Prayers to all the victims,their families and friends and to the community of Aurora Colorado after a senseless act of violence claims 12 lives and and injures 58 others at a movie theater.

It’s horrible that a much anticipated night at a midnight movie premiere could end in such tragedy.

http://www.mommywarriors.com/

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Mom’s Monthly Migraines

July 30,2012 | Written By: Alyssa | Categories:Alyssa's Camp,Battles,For Moms,Sick Bay |

Oh how I hate my monthly hormonal migraine.  It knocks me down for two days at a pop,they are totally debilitating.

Every month I can be found up in my room,curtains closed,with a pillow wrapped around my entire head. When I have to get up and drop the kids off somewhere,I’m wearing the darkest sunglasses I can find in the house and I’m crying the whole time.

I’ve taken many different things to try to alleviate the migraines and they work for 5 or 6 months and then the time will come where they do nothing and I’m on to the next one.

Women and their monthly issues have been around for how long and we can’t figure out how to get this stuff under control?

I know there are many women who are in the same boat on this one and I would love to hear how you combat your monthly migraine because I am at my wits end!

Desperately seeking migraine relief tips!

http://www.mommywarriors.com/

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Ohio boy hospitalized after 4-day Xbox marathon

August 8,2012 | Written By: Alyssa | Categories:Alyssa's Camp,Safety,Sick Bay |

Check out this article by Dylan Stableford from Yahoo News

A 15-year-old Ohio boy collapsed after a four-day Xbox marathon,his parents say.

The boy was holed up in his bedroom for the majority of the weekend playing Call of Duty:Modern Warfare 3,a “first-person shooter”game.

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Will Teddy Win the SportsNation Presidential Race?

The Washington Nationals have a comical presidential race before their games and it seems that Teddy Roosevelt NEVER wins!

SportsNation recently held a presidential race outside their Connecticut building and it was absolutley hysterical.  It aired a few weeks ago and I was sitting  with my family watching TV when it came on.  We were all pretty much on the floor laughing.  The video isn’t great but believe me,you will enjoy it!

http://www.mommywarriors.com/

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She’s Blonde Alright!

August 6,2012 | Written By: Alyssa | Categories:Alyssa's Camp,Entertainment,Family Platoon |

My daughter is a natural blonde and as she grows older,the amount of blonde moments she has is growing exponentially!

Take this morning for instance.  We got in the elevator on the 3rd floor after an early morning orthodontist appointment.  As always,the kids were fighting to push the buttons on the elevator.  My daughter won the battle and pushed the button.  The doors closed and we didn’t move.

After a few seconds my daughter asks,“why aren’t we moving?”

I look at my son (her twin) and he’s just shaking his head.  He says to her,“you idiot,we are on the third floor and you pushed #3,in order to go down you have to push #1!”

She looks back at him with a blank look and the only thing that comes out of her mouth is,“ohhhhhhhhh!”

I whispered to my son,“you’d better look out for her in high school.”

He replies,“yeah,I know,she’s legally blonde!”

www.mommywarriors.com

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MacGyver Would Be Proud!

July 19,2012 | Written By: Alyssa | Categories:Alyssa's Camp,Family Platoon |

My daughter is a hoot. She had decided to go take a shower after spending some time outside sunbathing. She was feeling kind of lazy and didn’t want to get her hair wet. Rather than asking if I had any type of shower cap,she took it upon herself to make her own.

our little Ms. MacGyver!

I guess if you ever in need of a shower cap,a big ziplock and some duct tape will do the trick,just a word of warning ,be careful pulling off the duct tape along your hairline!

http://www.mommywarriors.com/

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Chevy Volt – A Great MOM Car!

July 23,2012 | Written By: Alyssa | Categories:Alyssa's Camp,Family Platoon,For Moms,Money |

For years I have been driving around a tank of an SUV that just guzzles gas.  Afterall,having 4 kids does put a limit on what you could drive in order to fit them all in.

Given the state of the economy,the cost of gas and the amount of driving that I do around town,my husband and I have been thinking about whether we should expand our car fleet with something a bit more economical for me.  My husband drives a hybrid that’s great and when he travels I get to use it every now and then.

The kids are old enough now that I rarely have all 4 of them in the car when I bring them to practices,games,orthodontics appointments,to get x-rays (yes,4 active kids results in many bruised/broken bones),school and more.  Also,when the kids are in school,the grocery store is my second home along with all the other places I frequent on my errand runs.  On average,I spend a minimum of $400 on gas a month.

So sure,my husband and I talk about getting another car often but the issue that always comes up is money.  Does it make sense,is it worth spending the extra cash and can we afford it?

The other day we were picking up one of our vehicles at a local dealer,Wm. L. Morris Chevrolet in Fillmore,California when we got into a pretty heavy discussion about their Chevy Volt,a car that runs both on electric and gas.  To make a long story short,the staff at the dealership were awesome and I ended up taking a Volt home on a test drive for the weekend.  My plan,to drive it around town like any other normal weekend.  And that’s just what I did.  Volleyball practice,a Civil War re-enactment,grocery store,picking up take-ou,etc.,you name it,I used the Volt to do it.

I must admit,I was pleasantly surprised with the Chevy Volt.  A nice looking car,I felt very safe inside (remember,my SUV is a like a tank),the interior was comfortable,all computerized with touch screens,great pick up and the absolute best thing about it….I USED 0.03 gallons of gas all weekend!

Whenever I got home,I just plugged the Volt in and it would start charging up for my next excursion.

What an awesome Volt!

Unfortunately,I have to return the Volt this morning and I’m actually bummed about it.  Believe it or not,my teenagers,who are very critical about the car they drive around in,were just as impressed with the car,and let me tell,that’s a big kudos to Chevy.  Pleasing kids is difficult.

If I had the money readily available today,this mother of 4 would buy a Chevy Volt in a heartbeat and become a “Volt-Mom”.  Rather than a mini van or an SUV,any mom that does a ton of local driving should definately consider checking out a Volt!

www.mommywarriors.com

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Cell Phone in the Pool, Who’s Fault Is It?

July 31,2012 | Written By: Alyssa | Categories:Alyssa's Camp,Battles,Family Platoon |

Let me set the scene here…

So your kid gets pushed into the pool by some friends with his cell phone in his pocket and now the phone is ruined.

Who pays for the new phone?  Your kid or his friends?  Moms,I want to hear what you would do….

http://www.mommywarriors.com/

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Teaching Kids True Grit

By Leslie Morgan Steiner on June 25, 2012

Last week, after school got out but before my three kids scattered to camp and basketball tournaments, we kicked off summer at our new lake cabin in New England. Although none of us had ever driven a boat solo, we purchased an old 1986 13-foot Boston Whaler for the lake. The marine salesman gave us a 20-minute lesson. Then he pushed the boat away from the dock and we were off.

The first day went beautifully.

The second day, my 15-year-old son and his 10-year-old sister got stranded a mile out in the middle of the lake. The motor wouldn’t start (corroded spark plugs, we later discovered). As marine neophytes, we’d neglected to supply the boat with a paddle or rope for towing.

It took the kids two hours to get back to shore. I had no idea what had transpired until it was all over. Thank goodness. Because I had no chance to save them, to call the lake patrol, to swim out to rescue them!

Instead, they gritted it out.

And the next day, once new spark plugs had been installed, the 10-year-old took the boat out alone.

Which got me thinking: how do you teach kids resilience?

Funny paradox here. The only way parents can teach kids to be resilient is to do nothing. To back off and let go. There is no AP prep course or Mommy & Me session for teaching determination. The only solution is a little bit of neglect.

Which it’s so hard for parents today.

“This generation of parents,” explains psychologist Michael Thompson, author of Homesick and Happy: How Time Away From Parents Can Help a Kid Grow, “has invested an enormous amount of time in being emotionally close with their children and having very deep attachments. They’ve also invested an enormous amount in protecting their children from trauma. We have doubled the amount of time spent with children in the last 20 years. When you’re all in, it’s hard to step out - it’s just that simple.”

During the school year, my kids all work hard in school and on their various sports teams. They have teachers, tutors, coaches, two parents and four grandparents advising them, pushing them, cheering them and drilling them every step of the way. This is a top-down, dictatorial, linear path to achievement. Useful in life, certainly. But how and when will our kids ever find out what’s inside if we adults never leave them alone?

Perhaps not surprisingly, my children have all been eager to use their summers to get away from the rigors of school and adult oversight. To take the subway and bus alone. To walk to Five Guys by themselves. To spend weeks at sleepaway camp.

Perhaps my children know, better than I do, what they need to grow up and find their own ballast.

One daughter went away to camp at age nine - her choice, her insistence actually - even though I thought she was too young. Last Sunday I deposited her sister for three weeks alone with 300 girls and 70 horses in the wilds of West Virginia. She is only ten. Their brother will travel solo to tournaments in Philadelphia, Boston and Orlando now that he’s 15 and “legal” from the airlines point of view.

More from Michael Thompson:

“One of the things that troubles me about this generation is that we want our children endlessly challenged academically, but we don’t seem to want their resilience challenged in other ways. You can’t know you’re resilient until your resilience is challenged. And resilience or grit is key because it’s what gets you through the hard times in life.”

The summer parenting to do list is short and simple: do nothing.

Which is, of course, one of the toughest things for us to do.

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The $100 Dress Shirt

July 13,2012 | Written By: Alyssa | Categories:Alyssa's Camp,Family Platoon,School | My sharp dressed son!

I have to tell this story about my son’s shirt that he wore to his graduation.  As you can see it was a nice black shirt with a white collar and white cuffs,exactly what he wanted but,IMPOSSIBLE to find!  My son doesn’t ask for much so when he wanted this particular shirt,I thought,what the heck,I’ll get it for him.

Let me tell you,it was not an easy task for mom to pull this one off.  I spent hours on the internet trying to find this darn shirt in his size to no avail.  It was no where to be found. Sure,I could get it in a men’s 17 1/2 x 34 but that would be huge and to alter it would be a nightmare.   I thought what do I do?

Then the idea came to me.  I went out and purchased a black shirt and a white shirt,same,brand,same style.  I took them to the dry cleaners and asked them to put the white collar and cuffs on the black shirt.  They looked at me as if I had three heads but,they did it.

You can’t imagine the smile on his face when my husband picked it up and brought it home. Who would have thought that a shirt could bring so much happiness to a kid!  It cost a small fortune but,it was worth every penny to see him walk with pride amongst his classmates.

Chalk another one up for this MommyWarrior!

www.mommywarriors.com

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